I understand the trauma of growing up in an alcoholic family. It’s painful. The hallmark of it is the unpredictability of my life 24/7. The nascent anger floating in the air was always lurking there. I think the reason I got married when I was nineteen was because I needed to get out of my parents’ house by whatever means necessary. I married someone who was extremely unsuitable and that left a pretty bad scar. Sometimes subtle things like this can cause a life event that haunts me to this day.
I was able to use the lessons I learned from the alcoholic home in helping me cope and be realistic about what to expect in life.
The time I had a good relationship with my dad was when I worked for him as a dental assistant. My dad loved his profession and was a perfectionist in his performance. He took enormous pride that a kid from upstate New York was a dentist who worked with well-known patients. Dad was a born teacher and I was able to understand a great deal about dentistry. He was always happy at work so that brought out his best side. That happened from my age of 15 in 1957 until he died in 1969.
The most difficult time with him is when he would begin ranting and yelling about anything that struck his fancy at the moment. He would do things that really upset my mom like saying mean things about her relatives. He could be a most charming person when you met him or a total wretch. To this day I abhor living in a chaotic world. No wretches allowed!
Amen my friend. What an honest depiction of your dad. We are all so multi-faceted, complex and incredibly blessed to be on this earth for such a short time.
Thank you, Diana. I'm so grateful that I had those later experiences with my dad -- to really understand him and to know that he did the best he could. I love and miss him every day.
I understand the trauma of growing up in an alcoholic family. It’s painful. The hallmark of it is the unpredictability of my life 24/7. The nascent anger floating in the air was always lurking there. I think the reason I got married when I was nineteen was because I needed to get out of my parents’ house by whatever means necessary. I married someone who was extremely unsuitable and that left a pretty bad scar. Sometimes subtle things like this can cause a life event that haunts me to this day.
I was able to use the lessons I learned from the alcoholic home in helping me cope and be realistic about what to expect in life.
The time I had a good relationship with my dad was when I worked for him as a dental assistant. My dad loved his profession and was a perfectionist in his performance. He took enormous pride that a kid from upstate New York was a dentist who worked with well-known patients. Dad was a born teacher and I was able to understand a great deal about dentistry. He was always happy at work so that brought out his best side. That happened from my age of 15 in 1957 until he died in 1969.
The most difficult time with him is when he would begin ranting and yelling about anything that struck his fancy at the moment. He would do things that really upset my mom like saying mean things about her relatives. He could be a most charming person when you met him or a total wretch. To this day I abhor living in a chaotic world. No wretches allowed!
Thanks for sharing your experience with your dad, Joan. Much love to you! ❤️
Amen my friend. What an honest depiction of your dad. We are all so multi-faceted, complex and incredibly blessed to be on this earth for such a short time.
Thank you, Diana. I'm so grateful that I had those later experiences with my dad -- to really understand him and to know that he did the best he could. I love and miss him every day.
Keep writing. I choked back my tears.
Aw, thank you so much, Sara! ❤️